12 Things Truly Confident People Do Differently - part 2 of 2

BY TRAVIS BRADBERRY

7. They exercise.

A study conducted at the Eastern Ontario Research Institute found that people who exercised twice a week for 10 weeks felt more competent socially, academically, and athletically. They also rated their body image and self-esteem higher. Best of all, rather than the physical changes in their bodies being responsible for the uptick in confidence, it was the immediate, endorphin-fueled positivity from exercise that made all the difference.

8. They don't seek attention.

People are turned off by those who are desperate for attention. The truly confident know that being yourself is more effective than trying to prove you're important. People tend to read attitude quickly, and they're more attracted to the right kind of attitude than what, or how many, people you know. Confident people always seem to bring the right attitude.

Confident people are masters of attention diffusion. When they're receiving attention for an accomplishment, they quickly shift the focus to all the people who worked hard to help get them there. They don't crave approval or praise because they draw their self-worth from within.

9. They aren't afraid to be wrong.

Confident people aren't afraid to be proven wrong. They like putting their opinions out there because they learn a lot from the times when they're wrong, and other people learn from them when they're right. Self-assured people know what they are capable of and don't treat being wrong as a personal slight.

10. They stick their necks out.

When confident people see an opportunity, they take it. Instead of worrying about what could go wrong, they ask themselves, "What's stopping me? Why can't I do that?" and they go for it. Fear doesn't hold them back because they know that if they never try, they will never succeed.

11. They celebrate other people.

Insecure people constantly doubt their relevance, and because of this, they try to steal the spotlight and criticize others in order to prove their worth. Confident people, on the other hand, aren't worried about their relevance because they draw their self-worth from within. Instead of insecurely focusing inward, confident people focus outward, which allows them to see all the wonderful things that other people bring to the table. Praising people for their contributions is a natural result of this.

12. They aren't afraid to ask for help.

Confident people know that asking other people for help won't make them seem weak or unintelligent. They know their strengths and weaknesses, and they look to others to fill the gaps. They also know that learning from someone with more expertise is a great way to improve.

Bringing it all together.

Building confidence is a journey, not a destination. Please share your thoughts on the matter in the comments section below, as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

Source:

http://www.inc.com/travis-bradberry/12-things-truly-confident-people-do-differently.html?cid=readmore

12 Things Truly Confident People Do Differently - part 1 of 2

BY TRAVIS BRADBERRY

Confidence takes many forms, from the arrogance of Floyd Mayweather to the quiet self-assurance of Jane Goodall. True confidence -- as opposed to the false confidence people project to mask their insecurities -- has a look all its own. And truly confident people always have the upper hand over the doubtful and the skittish because they inspire others and make things happen.

"Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right." -- Henry Ford

Ford's notion that your mentality has a powerful effect on your success is manifest in the results of a recent study at the University of Melbourne that showed confident people went on to earn higher wages and get promoted more quickly than others.

Learning to be confident is clearly important, but what is it that truly confident people do that sets them apart from everyone else?

I did some digging to uncover the 12 cardinal habits of truly confident people, so you can incorporate these behaviors into your repertoire.

1. They get their happiness from within.

Happiness is a critical element of confidence, because in order to be confident in what you do, you have to be happy with who you are.

People who brim with confidence derive their sense of pleasure and satisfaction from their own accomplishments, as opposed to what other people think of their accomplishments. They know that no matter what anyone says, you're never as good or as bad as people say you are.

2. They don't pass judgment.

Confident people don't pass judgment on others because they know that everyone has something to offer, and they don't need to take other people down a notch to feel good about themselves. Comparing yourself to other people is limiting. Confident people don't waste time sizing up people and worrying about whether or not they measure up to everyone they meet.

3. They don't say yes unless they really want to.

Research conducted at the University of California, San Francisco, shows that the more difficulty you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and even depression. Confident people know that saying no is healthy, and they have the self-esteem to make their noes clear. When it's time to say no, confident people avoid phrases such as "I don't think I can" or "I'm not certain." They say no with confidence because they know that saying no to a new commitment honors their existing commitments and gives them the opportunity to successfully fulfill them.

4. They listen more than they speak.

People with confidence listen more than they speak because they don't feel as though they have anything to prove. Confident people know that by actively listening and paying attention to others, they are more likely to learn and grow. Instead of seeing interactions as opportunities to prove themselves, they focus on the interaction itself, because they know this is a far more enjoyable and productive approach to people.

5. They speak with certainty.

It's rare to hear the truly confident utter phrases such as "Um," "I'm not sure," and "I think." Confident people speak assertively because they know it's difficult to get people to listen if you can't deliver your ideas with conviction.

6. They seek out small victories.

Confident people like to challenge themselves and compete, even when their efforts yield small victories. One possible reason?  Small victories build new androgen receptors in the areas of the brain responsible for reward and motivation. The increase in androgen receptors increases the influence of testosterone, which further increases confidence and eagerness to tackle future challenges. When you have a series of small victories, the boost in your confidence can last for months.

Source:

http://www.inc.com/travis-bradberry/12-things-truly-confident-people-do-differently.html?cid=readmore

Why Do We, and Should, Make the New Year's Resolutions List? - part 3 of 3

How to stay committed to your resolutions throughout the New Year

Your resolutions are part of your journey in becoming a happier, healthier and more successful person. You make them because you want to achieve more, become more, give more to yourself.

This is why you need to have a clear statement of the purpose of your resolutions:

1.     Have a clear mission

For what purpose do you want to be 6 kilos lighter, or go on the holidays of your dream? Is it because you want to change your wardrobe, or feel more confident? Is it because you want to feel independent and free?

Having clarity on that will give your energy and ongoing internal motivation.

2.     Create new, healthy habits – at home, at work, in your relationships

Our days are full of habits that we don’t even notice – the way we sit in the car, the way we eat at the table, the way we greet the family in the morning. You can install new habits that, by virtue of constant practice and repetition, will turn from conscious choices into inherent habits after 30 to 90 days of repetition: choose to reach for an apple, rather than chips or snack; choose to prepare a to-do list for the next day at the end of each day, or choose to get off the bus or train a stop earlier, and walk the remaining distance home, every Tuesday night. And kiss your partner good night every evening.

3.     Have resourceful daily rituals

What do you do when you wake up in the morning – do you lie down for “just a few minutes”, or do you get up, called by your mission? The order of habits you have, is your morning ritual. You can create a healthy, resourceful series of actions, starting with a reminder of your mission and purpose. Or by telling that great person in the mirror how amazing, inspiring and strong they are. Affirmations, as you know, are a very powerful tool. Your ritual may then continue with having a glass of water (and lemon juice), a brisk exercise or a jog in the park.

What do you choose to have as an evening ritual? Do you make a list of the things you are grateful for before you go to bed? And a list of your achievements…

When you align your mission, your habits and rituals with your goals, you will act in congruence with the person you want to become. And when you team your act with self-discipline, your New Year’s resolutions will become attainable, and your commitment and ability to succeed – a natural part of who you are.

So, start making the Resolutions list!

Elena

Your Coach to Success