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15 Secrets of Really Persuasive People - part 1 of 2

Persuasive people have an uncanny ability to get you leaning toward their way of thinking. Their secret weapon is likability.

BY TRAVIS BRADBERRY

Author, 'Emotional Intelligence 2.0'

Whether you're trying to get the boss to fund your project or your preschooler to wipe his own hiney after using the bathroom, persuasion is a skill that's instrumental to success in life.

Persuasive people have an uncanny ability to get others leaning toward their way of thinking. Their secret weapon is likability. They get you to like more than their ideas; they get you to like them.

Here are the 15 tricks of the trade that exceptionally persuasive people use to their advantage.

1. They Know Their Audience

Persuasive people know their audience inside and out, and they use this knowledge to speak their audience's language. Whether it's toning down your assertiveness when talking to someone who is shy or cranking it up for the aggressive, high-energy type, everyone is different, and catching on to these subtleties goes a long way toward getting someone to hear your point of view.

2. They Connect

People are much more likely to accept what you have to say once they have a sense of what kind of person you are. In a negotiation study, Stanford students were asked to reach agreement in class. Without instruction of any kind, 55 percent of the students successfully reached agreement. However, when they were instructed to introduce themselves and share their backgrounds before attempting to reach agreement, 90 percent did so successfully.

The key here is to avoid getting too caught up in the back and forth of the discussion. The person you are speaking with is a person, not an opponent or a target. No matter how compelling your argument, if you fail to connect on a personal level, he or she will doubt everything you say.

3. They Aren't Pushy

Persuasive people establish their ideas assertively and confidently, without being aggressive or pushy. Pushy people are a huge turnoff. The in-your-face approach starts the recipient backpedaling, and before long, the person's running for the hills. Persuasive people don't ask for much, and they don't argue vehemently for their position, because they know that subtlety is what wins people over in the long run. If you tend to come across as too aggressive, focus on being confident but calm. Don't be impatient and overly persistent. Know that if your idea is really a good one, people will catch on if you give them time. If you don't, they won't catch on at all.

4. They Aren't Mousy

On the other hand, presenting your ideas as questions or as though they need approval makes them seem flawed. If you tend to be shy, focus on presenting your ideas as statements and interesting facts for the other party to mull over. Also, remove qualifiers from your speech. When you are trying to be persuasive, there is no room for "I think" or "It is possible that."

5. They Use Positive Body Language

Becoming cognizant of your gestures, expressions, and tone of voice (and making certain they're positive) will engage people and open them up to your arguments. Using an enthusiastic tone, uncrossing your arms, maintaining eye contact, and leaning toward the person who's speaking are all forms of positive body language that persuasive people use to draw others in. Positive body language will engage your audience and convince them that what you're saying is valid. When it comes to persuasion, how you say something can be more important than what you say.

6. They Are Clear and Concise

Persuasive people are able to communicate their ideas quickly and clearly. When you have a firm grasp on what you're talking about, it's fun and easy to explain it to those who don't understand. A good strategy here is to know your subject so well that you could explain it to a child. If you can explain yourself effectively to someone who has no background on the subject, you can certainly make a persuasive case with someone who does.

7. They Are Genuine

Being genuine and honest is essential to being persuasive. No one likes a fake. People gravitate toward those who are genuine because they know they can trust them. It's difficult to believe someone when you don't know who the person really is and how the person really feels.

Persuasive people know who they are. They are confident enough to be comfortable in their own skin. By concentrating on what drives you and makes you happy as an individual, you become a much more interesting and persuasive person than if you attempt to win people over by trying to be the person they want you to be.

Source:

http://www.inc.com/travis-bradberry/14-secrets-of-really-persuasive-people.html

What You Think You Become

Let us remember the quote from Earl Nightingale, "We become what we THINK about most of the time." This may seem outright ridiculous when we are hearing this for the first time; but the impact we have on the physical world with just our minds is very real.

This fact has been proved scientifically. Just look at the many eye-opening studies done in the 1980s by Dr. Masaru Emoto. These experiments actually demonstrate human beings shifting physical structures with their minds! These were not super humans, nor angels, nor magic tricks. These experiments were performed by regular, average people, and the results were incredible. Dr. Emoto scientifically proved that we all have physical powers beyond anything we've ever known. By the way, this power is NOT anything mystical or supernatural. This is the way we were created in the womb. We are all created to have the same potential and power as the richest (or poorest) person in the world. No one is better than anyone else, we were all created the same.

How can we practice this power for ourselves? There are a couple ways, however, do not expect to begin shifting your physical reality after one sitting. In our microwave, fast food, popcorn society, we lose sight of the importance of patience, practice, and relaxation. Enjoy your life. Understand that the first step to realizing our destiny in our own lives is acknowledging that we create our destiny. If you can wrap your mind around that, you have already placed yourself in the top 10% of the population. Many of our loved ones will never learn (or believe) this concept in their entire lifetime.

One of the best practices you can incorporate in your daily activities is a short 15-minute meditation. Do this everyday. Set a timer on your phone, and right before you go to bed, or just as you awake, or even during your lunch break, sit down in the quietest place you can find for just 15 minutes. What should you do during this 15 minutes? Close your eyes, and just breathe. Breathe ALL the way in, FILL your lungs with the oxygen your body has been craving. Breathe as though each air molecule is packed with ageless knowledge and healing vibrations. Then, breathe ALL the way out. Expel the toxicity that the body has been keeping trapped inside. Release the garbage that was being held for much too long, and make space for the new, delicious, vibrant powers that are making their way to you. OUT with the old, IN with the new. Practice this for just 15 minutes each day. Monitor your progress. You may notice a small (subtle) difference after Day 1, however by Day 7, you will begin to feel tremendous improvements.

What will the improvements be? This question is similar to asking how a flower smells, or what ice cream tastes like; the only way to really comprehend this is to try it for yourself, especially if you have never EVER done this before.

Why haven't most of us learned of the power of our mind? Maybe the same reason why 95% of the population is poor and middle income, while only 5% are considered rich or wealthy. This is a major secret that will never be talked about in schools, at work, nor on television. There are plenty of secrets that keep us in the dark each and everyday. Another secret is that the media subconsciously teaches the masses to use their brains in ways that will forever keep them stuck in the same place, struggling to make progress in life. Many people can work decades in a subordinate position they extremely dislike, but consider it absolutely normal; because this is what we are taught from a very young age by almost everyone we respect (especially through media programming).

Think about our loved ones that raised us from birth, how many of these people are actually living their dream life? Usually, we don't know anybody living their dream life. Even if we find one or two loved ones that claim they are living their dream, how many of them actually have the freedom (and energy) to do whatever they wish, whenever they wish, for however long they wish? This is true happiness, the main target that remains elusive to the public.

Nevertheless, since you have now read about this knowledge, you have the power. Start with the exercise outlined above, and begin to notice the very subtle changes in your landscape. If you continue to trust and acknowledge the power you have within, eventually you will begin to walk through this world effortlessly; like a genie. Your wish is truly YOUR command.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8798549